21st Century Dog

I’m an old school, retro dog lover. Gravy train and kibble, old soup bone, shag rug for a faux dog bed, a rubber ball for chew time and fetching and a 20th century dog had it made. Lassie defined my idea of canine responsibility (Timmy: “Lassie, grandpa fell into the abandoned mine shaft again, go get help)!  TV and movies displayed the star power of Rin Tin Tin and Airbud  and the smug confidence of Snoopy radiated from the daily comics.

My 21st century introduction to the modern dog occurred recently as I baby-sat my grand puppy, a 9 month Orlando Rescue pup. Part beagle, part pug and a soupçon of Old Yeller, he arrived with a prance in his step and some apprehension in his new surroundings. The latter promptly ebbed as he sat watching a stress reducing YouTube video of a Labrador retriever ambling through a verdant forest meeting a various assortment of rodents. This channel had 13 million views, although it was not clear if they were the human or canine type.

He turned his attention to his stash of bones. I had naively assumed a bovine bone was his only arsenal but the mass of dog owners and capitalist ingenuity had transformed this market into a cornucopia of choices. Looking for a bone down the Petco aisle was like looking for a variant of Pinot Noirs from multiple continental terroirs. The choices were endless: Rawhide, nylon, rubber, antler versus bovine, calcium phosphate, magnesium, salt poor and rich and  anti-oxidants. Bacon and cheese flavors could be added for those picky “chewers.” The packaging touted improved mouth health, jaw strengthening, tartar removal, improved oral microbiome, fresh breath, and supplemental vitamins and minerals that could turn your dog into an American Kennel Club icon.

Our grand pup discovered an old Frisbee in the closet which he immediately bonded. The plastic was going to be no match for his gnawing. I searched Amazon for a suitable dog Frisbee and found  Kong, a natural rubberized Frisbee that had nearly 27 thousand  4 1/2 out of 5 star reviews touting its durability and universal love of dogs for this flying disc. Seemingly a few hours passed when the Amazon delivery truck delivered the new dog disc. It was a hit with our pup: he was bounding after it on the sand  and over the desiccated, beached Portuguese Man o’ Wars on the South Florida shores. He had no worries about jellyfish-like envenomation, as our son had secured top notch “doggie” health insurance (at what age would he be converted to Medicare coverage? 65yrs/7,  I mused).

Was Hollywood discovery his only path to canine fame and fortune? Again my naïveté of 21st century dog occupations was exposed. Entrepreneurial  dogs have started their own businesses or helped their owners launch successful ventures. They offered products or services that catered to other dogs or dog lovers, such as grooming, training, accessories, food and treats. Some of them had patents or trademarks for their inventions or innovations. Examples of dog entrepreneurs include Manny The Frenchie (@manny_the_frenchie), who runs a non-profit organization that supports animal shelters and also has a net worth of $1 million; Walter Geoffrey (@waltergeoffreythefrenchie), who sells his own line of clothing and accessories that feature his signature sass and also has a rap album coming out soon; and Loki The Wolfdog (@loki), who co-founded a travel app called Loki The Wolfdog that lets you explore the world with your furry friend and also has a movie deal with Netflix. Dog influencers populate the Internet and often have more subscribers than humans. Tuna (@tunameltsmyheart), an Instagram celebrity,  has a distinctive overbite that makes him look like he’s always smiling and also has a book deal with Penguin Random House.

Opportunities are indeed endless for the new century pooch. Our grand pup with improved nutrition, better emotional adjustment and love, can be the best dog he can be. If I can only get him to watch the YouTube instructional video on Frisbee catching, I know he’ll be ready to perform in next year’s Super Bowl halftime.